Sanditon Episode 2 Photo-Recap; PineappleGate 1817

BAAAAAHAHHAHAHAHAHA you GUYS. I can’t just sit here and start the recap at the beginning, NOT addressing the end of the episode where Charlotte SAW SIDNEY NAKED. *delighted naughty giggles forever*

Okay, now that that’s out of the way we can talk about the themes of being trapped, and how every character, no matter their status is someway or another dealing with NOT seeing Sidney naked EXCEPT for Charlotte because she totally just saw him naked!! BAAAHAHHHAHA did you really think I would move on so fast???? What a way to end an episode!! Sanditon is taking the old adage “give ‘em what they want,” a little too seriously, and I am HERE FOR IT. 

“Young women, you are flowers and you fulfill Jesus’ will by simply blossoming and readying yourselves for the day you shall be plucked.” Ew, ew, ew. Get it out of here. 

Meanwhile my boy Arthur was spending his day launching gender roles into the sun, saying HE wants to be a flower, and that ladies should have the choice to toil if they want to. You be a flower, Arthur! You can be anything you want to be! #SunflowerArthur

This episode cleared up a LOT about our resident incest duo; chiefly that they are NOT incesting with each other. They are step-siblings who are in love/lust, and they want Mean Old Rich Lady’s money so they can run away and be together. It’s all very Cathy and Heathcliff, and that did NOT end well for those two. 

Another thing this scene revealed was their eeeeeeeeeevil plan to discredit Clara by having Sir Buttheadington seduce her. But then SHE seduced HIM instead!!! Man alive, I love the women on this show. 

Mean Old Rich Lady’s greed overshadowed her racism, and she hopped aboard the #EdLambe ship (get it? Cause it sounds like bedlam… whatever, you know I’m not good at these). 

Well hello there Mr. Stringer! He’s the obviously put-upon foreman bringing Tom’s “ambitious” vision to life, and boy NOTICED Charlotte (and her mad architecture knowledge) in a big way. [Note to self, learn more about how buildings are… what’s the word? Built? I don’t know.]

Charlotte apologized for her slightly-maybe-possibly mean remarks directed at his family, and he was like, “I don’t care, you are nothing, my heart does not quicken when you are near, you don’t exist in my dreams or anything. Also, you smell of poo.” Then our girl called him out so hard for being needlessly rude and hurtful. 

You guys, my crush on Charlotte is OUT OF CONTROL. *pulls self together* What were we talking about? Oh right, the plot.

Lord Babs is all over Esther, and he will not be put off by her absolute distain for him. SOUNDS like problematic, but… it’s… not? I don’t know. I still like him because the show wants me to like him, and there was that one time when he said women are not property, so yeah, I’m fine with it as long as his persistence doesn’t border on harassment. 

YAY! ROMANCE!

Meanwhile, Sidney was engaging in a fight club (our boy has some aggression that needs to be let out, ammiright??), when a girl came running in yelling his name, which we all know from every fight scene ever is the surest way to get your friend’s ass kicked. He didn’t, but only because of his Dauntless training. 

Okay, so Sidney is Georgiana’s guardian, and he made her come to England from the West Indies, and then took her away from London for REASONS (intrigue!), and now she hates him. 

Anyway, the pineapple party was horribly, deliciously, awkwardly awful. Mean Old Rich Lady only held the party to A) put Ms. Lambe on display, B) up her own social status by being friends with the heiress oddity, and C) secure Ms. Lambe’s fortune for her gross nephew. NOT a great time for everyone, but it was worth it for the amount of SASS.

Charlotte was NOT falling for Sidney’s trap again, and he seemed very put off by it. Speaking of throwing some much-deserved sass, Georgiana put Mean Old Rich Lady in her place, and I was LOVING IT. I was also loving our hero Arthur jumping in to diffuse the tension like a magical, wonderful prince, cutting into the pineapple to find it “rotten to the core.” #GiveArthurSomePineapple

Remember last recap when I was like, “I love the Mean Old Rich Lady, she tells it like it is!” My love for her took a hit this episode when she was overtly and unnecessarily cruel to Georgiana. Then she threw a hissy at Tom about his relations, angry that she can’t even be horribly offensive in her own home, and threatened to pull her financial support for his Girlfriend-Town. So, Charlotte went to the MORL to smooth things over for her new friend.

Mean Old Rich Lady genuinely asked Charlotte for her opinion and seemed amused by the whole situation, which gives me hope that she’ll circle back to being likable by the end of this season (and beyond, hopefully). 

Georgiana tried to get the H outta dodge, but the coach wouldn’t take her without money. I will say I was pleasantly surprised that they would have let her on if she had the fare. Sure, perhaps they would have believed a white woman when she said she’d pay them upon arrival, but it honestly didn’t feel like this interaction was based on racism, which was refreshing. 

As she was trying to escape, Sidney was entertaining his pals through booze, cards and dames (the cool kid starter pack, basically). It was here that we learned Babs is a good dude, and Sidney is protective of the ladies, so we’re to assume he’s a good dude, too. 

Tom was like, “MAKE THEM STAY FOREVER AND EVER,” and Sidney was like, “relax, dude, the smell of your desperation is almost as bad as the shoe closet in a bowling alley.”

And a beautiful friendship was born! I was hoping for it from the moment Charlotte tried to stand up for Georgiana at PineappleGate1817, but now it’s totally official. Charlotte saw Georgiana having a bit of a moment on a cliff (girl, we’ve all been there), then they walked and talked and played in the ocean, and now they’re absolute besties. #SisterhoodOfTheTravelingBonnet  

But nevermind all that, let’s get the most important aspect of this episode… WHAT IS THIS MAGNIFICENT GARMENT???

I mean sure, this scene was about her and Sir Creepingford “getting rid” of Clara so they can get Lady’s money and… be together? I don’t know, I don’t care, all I want is for Esther to rule the town wearing that collar. 

Anyway, then Georgiana was collected by her fussing keeper, and Sidney went for a walk, and… *giggles*.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *sigh* She turned around and they had an awkward conversation about how neither of them like seeing the other (SURE PALS), and then Charlotte ran away. 

Jane Austen with butts is something I didn’t realize I needed in my life. Yet here we are. 

And that’s that! As I was trying to say at the top of this recap before I rudely interrupted myself with appreciation for Sidney’s glistening naked body seared into Charlotte’s brain (I will love this forever), it really does seem that every character is struggling within their own personal cage.

Tom seems to be trapped by the town itself, constantly worried about its success and failures. Clara, Edward and Esther are trapped by the favour of their aunt, as well as society’s refusal to accept their creepy love/lust triangle. Ms. Lambe is trapped by the decisions of her guardian, as well as some pretty rampant racism. Diana is trapped by her imagined ailments, and even Charlotte is trapped in her own mind because she can’t stop thinking about SIDNEY NAKED, hahahahahha I will never get over this. 

It doesn’t seem to matter what their title is, or how much money they have, the residents of Sanditon are STRUGGLIN’. They are, in the words of Tom, “beset with worries.” Everyone of course but my beloved Arthur, who seems oblivious to anyone’s troubles, including his own, and my GOD I love him so much.

SOME STUFF

• The views and opinions of the characters of Sanditon do not reflect the views of the author of this recap (re: bowling). 

• Our boy Arthur walking into the party yelling WINE like a total boss was definitely an episode highlight. #WineForArthur

• It was insinuated that Clara suffered sexual abuse as a child. 😦 I hope that issue is addressed, and I also hope Clara and Esther become allies. 

• Hey, did anyone else notice that one time Charlotte saw Sidney naked? That was weird, right?

• Love triangle; yea, nay, or am I reading into it? (I’m totally not reading into it) 

• 2 episodes in, what do you guys think? Are you hooked? Or do you miss Mr. Darcy?

OKAY THANKS FOR COMING TO MY GRAPEFRUIT PARTY IT’S IMPORTANT TO EAT YOUR FRUITS AND VEG, BYE!