The Adventure Squad is BACK as we’ve never seen them before; domestic. There was soup! There was cookware! There was a GD picnic, and middle school, and master bedrooms. Of course, this is The 100, so it wasn’t all interior design and PTA meetings; there was violence and death (bye forever Russell?), and social tension, and raging fires, and impassioned proclamations, and people pulling inanimate objects out of body parts that should not contain inanimate objects! Basically, just another day on The 100.
Yay!! I missed this. I missed the bananas mayhem and the Beautiful Creepster’s sass, and everyone’s serious-face, and Clarke’s low speech-making register, and the rare moments of levity, and the extremely talented people who bring these characters to life.
From The Ashes did what any good season premier should; it started lining up the dominoes (our hearts), in order to knock them down, or, you know, completely destroy them (again, our hearts). I was fully prepared to invest in whatever villainous or redemptive arc Russell was bound for, but NOPE, once again this show zigged when I thought it would, I don’t know, do something else? I never learn, apparently. Silly Toni.
The episode started in the moments after the season 6 finale, with our beloved hero Bellamy screaming his sister’s name, only to be instantly knocked out by a ghost and dragged away (to what I hope is a spa day because that boy deserves a rest). Then Hope woke up from her anomaly slumber (her anomalnap, if you will), and got straight to throat-punching hunks and scampering off, while Gabriel and Echo (the Anomalventure Squad) figured out they had some ghosts to deal with.
Echo started laying down fire to clear a path, and off she and Gabe went after Bellamy. Meanwhile, Sanctumventure Squad was being just SO DOMESTIC.
Now that the flame is out of Madi, she’s no longer the Commander, which means she can just be a kid and live her life (on THIS show?? Hahahahahhahhahahaha x forever). Buuuuuuuuuut, if they tell everyone, Wonkru might go a little bonkers, so mum’s the word.
NOW, can we all take a second or an hour or a year to celebrate the overdue unification of Clarke with the Adventure Squad???. No one was throwing snide comments her way, no one was questioning her, or glaring, or trying to straight-up murder her. Look, I know this show doesn’t go backwards, so I’m not asking for the Rick/Daryl relationship that Clarke and Raven were rocking in season 2, but I look forward to this relationship evolving into the glorious partnership it was always meant to be.
Anyway, Raven mentioned mothers, and Clarke was like, “what even ARE mothers, hahaha, whatever, everything’s great, I lose someone like every other day, don’t even worry about it.”
During a gloriously normal (which is so ABnormal on this show) summer picnic, everyone started toasting Abby, and my boy Jackson was like, “hmmmmm, maybe the dude who got MY best friend body-snatched shouldn’t toast her?” But Clarke was like, “chill out, man, he’s cool,” because remember, Clarke was fine, totally fine, everything was fine, don’t even worry about it.
Hope stopped running through the forest like a woodland nymph long enough to PULL A METAL CYLINDER FROM HER OWN FLESH, which contained a note that said “trust Bellamy” on the back of an anomaly treasure map or something. Past-Hope stans Bellamy! You’re not alone, girl. You are not alone.
Predictably, all the different groups of people now converged on Sanctum were not exactly getting along. The surviving prisoners from Diyoza’s (miss you!) rebellion wanted to move into the palace, but the surviving Santumites were like, “um, no?” and then the surviving Kids of Gabe were like, “how about us, though?” and Clarke had to come in and break them all up like a kindergarten teacher putting away a toy because “if you can’t share nicely, no one gets to play”.
Jordan was sent to check on Russell to assuage his followers’ worries that he was being tortured; like being forced to eat too much ice cream until he’s bloated and gassy, or tickle his feet until he cries from giggling, or force him to listen to All About that Base on repeat.
The talk went fine, in that Russell wasn’t fussed about his treatment. Now that his wife and daughter were for-realsies-gonzo, dude was super ready to shed his mortal coil. Jordan was like, “okay whatever, but like, what’s with the symbols in my dreams?” Turns out during his “readjustment”, Jordan saw the symbol that Russel built the town around… and didn’t suspect it could have possibly been because he saw it literally every day since landing on the planet. Anyway, our sweet precious boy is #TeamSanctum now, but I’m sure it’s fine.
Hope, being a teleporting woodland fairy (we don’t know, she might be!), easily caught up with Echo and Gabriel, and was like, “my flesh-note says the only person I can trust is Bellamy,” and so they all decided to run as fast as they could to the anomaly to get back their precious dreamboat hero.
Remember that time the Beautiful Creepster and Emori were going to betray all their pals and become immortal, but at the last minute they changed their minds and saved everyone instead (classic them), by pretending to be Primes? Yeahhhhhh, that’s still happening, I guess? All the Sanctumites still think they’re Gods, so they keep bowing and shit, and Murphy (who seems like the kind of guy who would be super into people bowing to him), was annoyed by it. Perhaps it was his intense guilt over Abby’s death? *shrug*
Anyway, as per usual, Murphy changed his mind about helping and he and Emori impersonated the Primes in order to break up a budding fight in the square over Russell. Some people wanted him dead, some people wanted him alive, and some people wanted to give him a lil’ smooch (I assume). So they moved him to the palace for safety, and the Squad bantered SO DELIGHTFULLY about Murphy and Emori living there with him until their probable murder. 💜
Madi was all up in Clarke’s biz about not feeling anything about her mom’s death, and Clarke was like, “omg how many times do I have to say how absolutely cool I am about the whole thing????” Madi admitted that her own biological mother died in her arms (during praimfaya I assume), and it was pretty heartbreaking, but Clarke just sort of shrugged and was like, “sucks for you, man.”
Clarke and Gaya had a beautiful chat about what Gaya gave up to save Madi. She’d been led by her faith for as long as we’ve known her, and mere days ago she destroyed everything that faith stood for in order to save the life of her young friend. Clarke acknowledging that, and appreciating not only sacrifice, but her presence in Madi’s life… hearts for days, guys. HEARTS FOR DAYS. Anyway, their co-parenting was cut short by an explosion, and Clarke had to scamper.
Meanwhile, the Anomalsquad was running through what looked like Nuclear Winter FernGully, when they were simultaniously attacked by the tripping-balls-toxin and the ghosts.
ROOOOOAAAAANNNNNN!!! I am 100% unobservant, and thus I missed Zach McGowan’s name in the opening credits, so I made a delighted little squeak in the supply closet I was watching this show in (I wish I was joking). Anyway, HallucinaRoan and HallucinaRealEcho gave our girl a hard time about her future plans, and what schools she’s applying to or whatever. Luckily Echo ignored them long enough to shoot the ghosts attacking them, using the drifting particles in the air to create negative-space targets. SCIENCE!
Turns out the ghosts were just some dudes in invisible robo-suits, with information on all of our main characters. Most of them were set to “capture”, but Hope was “kill on sight”, which is unsettling.
The robo-dudes could somehow control the anomaly, and they were closing it behind them after going through. So, our brave little toasters all held hands and walked in together, in order to not be separated by time. (But, if Bellamy went in before them, then…?)
Back at Sanctumville, Clarke discovered the Sanctumites were gathered outside Russell’s door so they could sing him to sleep or whatever, AND Captain Kid of Gabe wanted Russell to be publicly executed. So many people with countering viewpoints! DELICIOUS.
Clarke had a bit of a chat with Russell where she asked him to tell his people what to do, but he just kept calling her a dumb-dumb for not killing him. She tried to talk over him, but he just kept repeating how stuuuuuuuupid she was for not ending his life, and what a colossal doofus she was being. Finally, he gave her Abby’s belongings, and EFFFFFING HELL, even I wanted to jump through the screen and rip out his heart. Goddamn, I miss Abby.
Clarke understandably went berserk and beat the shit out of him, accidentally but maybe not-so-accidentally starting a fire that raged through the entire palace.
Twist! Sheidheda wirelessly uploaded himself onto Russell’s Matrix bug, and decided to casually mind-murder him and give him a taste of his own body-snatching medicine! Hahahahaha, how delightfully horrifying!!
Russell was an interesting character with murky motivations who lived in the gray (my fav), and his depths will be missed (that is, if he really is gone for good). Sheidheda, on the other hand, has always been an evil mystery. Is he as one-note as we’ve been led to believe, or is there something else there? The 100 rarely presents us with a cut-and-dry villain, so I look forward to whatever revelations lurk behind Shade-Master’s deviousness (I hope it’s a childhood fear of blondes).
Clarke couldn’t let Not-Russell die in the fire, but she also wasn’t about to let him off the hook now that her righteous rage had been unleashed. She gave a rousing speech about how there was no need for a palace because this isn’t a damn Disney movie, and they could use the space for a basketball court or something. It was very inspiring, and everyone loved the idea! Well… not everyone, because the Sanctumites aren’t super pumped about their God being executed, but whatever, you can’t please everyone.
Then she slow-mo walked down some steps while Not-Russell grinned, and holy cowboys was it ever AWESOME, and my crush on Eliza Taylor intensified tenfold.
YOU GUYS! This is the last season premier of The 100 ever. As sad and weird as that feels, I’m happy the show will go out on its own terms, and give us an appropriately crafted final season. So many shows have fallen victim to a rushed ending, or a cliffhanger that never got to… um, climb back up? But The 100 knows what it’s doing, for better or for worse, and I’m pumped to go on this final ride with a show I’ve loved for so many years.
I’m invested. I’m all in. Go ahead, The 100, use my heart as a domino. You will crush me, I know you will, and I will love you for it.
- Raven saying ‘good thing ALIE’s not around,” for SURE means ALIE will be around.
- The Blake siblings were dearly missed, and I look forward to their triumphant return.
- That being said, I was delighted by the screentime our beloved Queen Indra received. She is a BOSS, and I am so, so excited to dive deeper into her relationship with Gaya. As always, MORE INDRA PLEASE! And Miller! I was happy to see him getting some attention. And Jackson! Basically I was happy for everyone who got to shine while the Blakes were taking their anomalnaps.
- Related: I love Miller and Clarke together (Mount Weather buds!) but I also want to see Miller supporting Octavia. I know he was pissed last season about what she “made” him do, but she got him through hell, and he was one of her main guys. Fix that bestfriendship, please!
- What with focusing on Clarke’s emotional state, her heart-to-heart with Gaya, and Murphy’s guilt, it really seems like The 100 is going to focus in on the characters and their relationships this season. A very welcome development!
- Damn, Madi, break my heart whydon’tya. High-five to Lola Flanery, because that scene was haaaaaaaaard to watch, in the best way.
- Hope halucina-saw our girl Octavia calling herself “auntie”, and I honestly can’t wait for the inevitable Octavia-centered episode, gimme, gimme, gimme.
- I know the Sanctumites seem silly for putting unwavering trust in Jordan Jasper Green after having known him for like a week, but honestly, LOOK AT THAT FACE, CAN YOU BLAME THEM?
- Hope, Gabriel and Echo standing around talking about how fast they can or cannot run before taking off in a full sprint was very, very funny to me.
- We will absolutely be seeing Bonnie and Clyde again, and maybe their wig collection.
- Madi is drawing commander memories! Does that mean they’re not truly gone????
- JR Bourne is a very talented dreamboat, and I look forward to seeing how he sheds Russell and dons Sheidheda (even as he pretends to be Russel). Deja-Josephine, anyone?
- PICASSO THE DOG BE STILL MY HEART
- Since the moment Hope stumbled out of the anomaly in last season finale, I have theorized (wished) that the anomaly would be all wibbly-wobbly-timey-wimey, and that the 7th season would take us on a journey through The 100’s past. Gabe’s comment that “time is acting up” definitely has me excited. I mean, it’s the first episode and we already got a guest star from the past (miss you so much, Roan!)
To feed this hope, and for a bit of meta fun, I’m going to pepper every recap with a joke from past recaps. I don’t mean running gags, like Dream Weaver, or calling Murphy The Beautiful Creepster. I’m talking one-off obscure shit. Whoever can spot them will get major points that mean absolutely nothing!
- On a scale of one to “concerning heart palpitations,” how excited are you that our beloved Adventure Squad has returned?
OKAY THANKS FOR COMING, STAY SAFE OUT THERE, FRIENDS!