Before we begin, let’s do a quick check-in. How are you guys doing? You okay? Are you rocking back and forth in your La-Z-Boys, staring blankly at your TVs with melted ice cream dribbling down your chin? ME TOO! I’m currently dictating this photo recap to a trained monkey, so we’ll see how it turns out.
This is unprecedented. UNPRECEDENTED, I say! Sure, we’ve had some pretty traumatic deaths on this show, but three at once? Roan was in the credits for shit’s sake… THE CREDITS.
Remember before the break when I was like, “it’s been nice to chill out for a bit and check in with the emotional state of our characters, but I’m ready for some ‘holy shit’ moments. YOU GUYS, this entire episode was a 40-minute-long holy shit moment. I was very worried for everyone at all times. And then, after all that, it was basically for nothing.
CLAAAAAAAAARKE! *wags finger* Look, I get it, she’s our hero, so she thinks she has to do hero things, but she’s getting on my last nerve. I KNOW, I KNOW, she’s so grey, and I love grey, but honestly, girl has some major trust issues. Octavia single-handedly saved the human race. Everything was totes fine, and then little miss Wanheda had to fudge it all up. It’s almost like she knew there were still 3 episodes left in the season or something.
[EDIT – after a day to simmer, I realize I would be lauding her a hero if Luna had won, which was a very real possibility. In that situation CLARKE would have been saving the human race, so fiiiiiiine, Clarke, sorry I got mad, you keep doing you. But you DO have trust issues!]
It wouldn’t be the beautiful, violent teen adventure we’ve come to love if shit didn’t go horribly wrong all the time. So let’s dive in! Alright, Monkey, get those furry fingers screen-grabbin’!
The episode began with a nice pre-battle brother/sister moment, which, if you’ll recall, is the first time these two have seen each other since she was like, “the only reason I didn’t murder you is because we’re blood related, peace out forever.”
Then Clarke came in and was all, “go get ‘em!” and Octavia gave her a look like, “why are you being weird?” and walked out. It was glorious.
Speaking of glorious (everything this episode was glorious), the champions were lining up and putting on participation necklaces like it was a super intense track-and-field day, when some surprise guests showed up.
Luna!!!! Luna’s character took a dark turn, and I ain’t even mad. This is one of those times when a dramatic character about-face was earned (unlike Finn driving a bus off a cliff into Bonkerton, for example). Luna has been struggling with her “darkness” from the moment we met her on her hipster rig, and she’s been battling with her beliefs ever since every single person she’s ever loved died horrible deaths, AND all she’s seen since then has been people doing shitty things to each other. So… yeah, I’ll buy this.
Anyway, she basically vowed to end humanity. Jeez, Luna, dramatic much?
Backstage, Indra gave Octavia a pep talk that tore all of our hearts out, don’t even pretend like it didn’t.
YOU GUYS THEY BOTH CRIED, and then I cried, and we ALL cried, because Indra said Octavia IS her people, and we all know that to be true, and maybe Octavia is about to die.
Meanwhile, the Skaikru brain trust huddled up to practice being assholes.
This was hard, you guys. Remember when they met and she had weirdly dyed red hair, and he dragged her around the countryside, and they engaged in a bunch of fisticuffs? Man, what a fun meet-cute.
When Kane and Bellamy started giving Octavia pointers about fighting, I was like, “um, guys, how many grounders have you brutally murdered? She’s got this.” But they were surprisingly helpful!
I liked this a lot. It would have been easy for these two to solve their relationship issues just moments before her possible death, but we would know she was forgiving him through circumstance, not with any true shift in her opinion.
Then the conclave started, and it was very intense and exciting! Everyone’s mean faces were so good! Even Ilian! Look at this adorable mug:
Awe. Little guy.
Octavia happened upon someone who already knew how to be aggressive.
She followed Bellamy’s advice to run and hide, which was a good move because then this fellow stumbled upon Roan, and all of a sudden Roan was taking out two warriors at once. Fight scenes are near impossible to screen-grab, so I’ll summarize this epic brawl with words: Roan was like, “hiiiya!” and his shield thingy broke and he threw it like, “Take that!” Then the other guy was like, “pow, punches and kicks!”, then Roan went, “just gonna cleave your head in two like it’s no big deal,” then the other guy was like, “I’m gonna fight, too! I like to fight! Please include me!” Then Roan was like, “I’m so good I fight in slow motion sometimes.” and the other guy was all, “damn! Punch, stab, slash!” And Roan just shook his head like, “Ohhhh no ya don’t.” And he killed him.
It was very tense, and very awesome. The fellow he brutally murdered to death was from Trikru, which means Indra and all her peeps are going to burn to death in a fiery inferno.
This was a nice ‘let’s make-up before we die’ moment between Indra and her daughter. #HereForTheHugs
Then we got our first lady showdown.
Let’s take a sec to appreciate how gloriously awkward this whole episode was. These people used to be pals! Roan, Clarke, Octavia, Ilian, Bellamy, Echo… even the Trikru guy. So many people who used to chill out together were now trying to kill each other, which I’m pretty sure is a social faux pas.
Speaking of, Octavia was tending to the giant gash in her arm when Ilian popped in for a catch-up sesh.
Poor guy just wants some mid-battle love from his crush and she’s all, “for real, I’ll murder a hunk, I ain’t even bothered.”
Bellamy was enjoying the entertainment when he noticed a certain sassy spy was missing / shooting people.
Bellamy rushed off to deal with it all Bellamy-style, and Kane was totally for it. Remember when Kane came to the ground and put Bellamy in jail for punching Murphy? Haha… these two.
Then Octavia got herself into a bit of a pickle, and again, it’s impossible to screen-grab that shit, so: Octavia shook her head all, “ohhhhh boy”, and not one but THREE other champions were like, “ohhhh yeah, this is happening,” then Ilian was all, “aaaaiiiiieeeeee party time! Punch, kick, stab!” And Octavia was all, “aw hell yeah, Imma cut this guy’s hand off!” And Ilian was like, “WHOA COOL!” And they won.
At this point I am not ashamed to say that I screamed out something like, “ECHO YOU BLORFING ZIGGUT!” because I was incapable of forming real words.
Ilian asked Octavia to kill him because “she promised” *sob*, and so she did, and once again she had to watch her love interest die brutally in front of her very eyes.
This was very sad. Goodbye Ilian. To think, if Skaikru had never come to the ground, you’d be chillin’ at your farm, doing whatever it is you did with those sheep, blissfully unaware of the radioactive hellfire coming your way.
Bellamy scampered to Echo’s death-window and they had some words.
I have been begging for a bromance for Bellamy for years, and like a benevolent TV Deity, The 100 didn’t give me what I want… it gave me what I need. Bellamy’s bromance was in front of me the whole time… with his actual sister. Their sibling relationship has consistently been the beating heart of this show, and it was real nice, real nice, to see that bond shine during such an otherwise brutal episode. Will their relationship be perfect now? No, of course not. But they’re on the road to recovery, and that is an awesome gift The 100 has given us this day.
Anyway, Octavia tried to attack Roan, but he had something different in mind.
Alliance!! Man, Roan is just so damn reasonable. The two of them challenged Luna, and it went a little something like this:
Luna was like, “gimme a sec, just killing this girl real quick,” then they were like, “banter, haha”, then Octavia joined in and Luna was all, “I just Matrixed your sword, sucka! Kapow, blam, clank!” Then she punched Octavia straight in the face, then Roan was like, “Who da besss, I’M DA BESSS, blamo, fool!” and he was about to stab Luna when Octavia was all , “holy shit, black rain, Immaouttahere!” and Roan was like, “naw, I’m cool. I got her.” And then this happened:
Octavia wins, and the crowd goes wild! She did it by being “the girl in the floor”, which is damn well bloody amazing. She ran and hid and snuck around, and it resulted in one dead nightblood. Bye Luna! You were very cool.
Then, in a dramatic moment that Octavia earned the shit out of, she walked in and threw the mardi gras death beads on the floor, essentially announcing her kickass victory.
This was awesome. Octavia announced that Skaikru would be sharing the bunker, essentially saving all of humanity. Well done, madam.
HOWEVER…
And that’s that! What do you guys think? Was Clarke right to take the bunker? Was she just doing what was best for her people, once again “bearing the burden so they don’t have to?” Or is she a total asshole?
IT’S SO GREY!
I don’t like to rank episodes as “best” or “worst” because each one brings us something different, but Die All, Die Merrily was certainly the most WHAT THE EFFING SHEEZE WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED HOLY SHIT.
It made me swear, you guys. It made me swear lots. It’s also a great set-up for the remaining three episodes. What in the sweet hell is going to happen next?? I give this episode roughly a thousand and fourteen out of ten. YOU?
SOME STUFF
- So many hugs!
- So what happens to the people left outside the bunker right now? What about Kane and Octavia? Hmmmm, show?
- We’re all mourning a lot of things right now (for example, the Bellarke ship going down in flames of betrayal, ammiright, shippers?), but more importantly, we shall never know the mysterious backstory Luna had with Roan.
- What is the Adventure B Squad up to right now? Are they high off nuts? Do they regret their decision to stay behind? Are Jasper and Monty standing in a corner repeatedly doing their special high-five? Is Riley regaling them with tales of his as-yet-unexplained rich and complex backstory?
- Crazy Ex Girlfriend is an excellent show, and the song Lady Boss is 10 / 10.
- Fun fact – tv.com spellcheck had a problem with BLORFING, but not ZIGGUT. Hmm.
- Do you think Raven and Hallucination-Becka are still getting along?
- ARE YOU OKAY?
[Originally Posted May 2017 on tv.com]
Toni Watches 
ORIGINAL POST COMMENTS:
Klaussays
May 08, 2017
The 100 does it again.Balls of god damn steel. Offing Ilian, Roan and Luna in the same episode.
Luna’s arc was glorious but so heartbreaking. That running spin kill she did was sexy as hell.
Clarke and Roan’s falling out hurt as much as any death..
Grounder guy that beat Octavia’s ass in season 2 was a cool callback.
I know there are Bellarkers everywhere but Echo and Bellamy are going to have hate sex first..Mark my words.
As much as the action was great there where beautiful moments interspersed throughout.
Luna drowning Roan, great calback and i know like me everyone was hoping he was pulling the same trick.
Clarke’d decision is more understandable after some thought but coldblooded all the same…Roan told her to fuck off and Luna arrived.
mellafe
May 08, 2017
This might be my favorite episode of the show. Yup. I yelled, I cried (twice), I panicked, I went ohnoyoudidn’t and then ohnoshedid, and it was GLORIOUS. You’re here for the hugs, and I’m here for character development (vs plot).
So sad to see the best bromance on the show go 😦 I’ll miss it as much as I miss Lexa’s puns.
Also, Jaha is the worst. I just wanted to say it.
Kids_Table
May 07, 2017
P.S.-& really loved this Hunger Games episode.
Kids_Table
May 07, 2017
You guys: Can I just take a timeout for a moment to say if season 5 takes place entirely in a bunker I am going to be more than just a little bummed out.
Really hoping over here that someone manages to save the world in the next three episodes (looking at you, Raven).
Bellamy/Octavia was for sure the backbone of this episode and their brother/sister dynamic is always my favourite. I find it fascinating that no one else on the Arc had a sibling, and I really don’t feel like they explore that bond enough.
RIP Roan and Luna. I really found it hard to care about Ilian, so I am feeling much more ‘meh’ about that one.
You guys think Bellamy will open the bunker door? He seems the likely candidate to do it.
Klaussays
May 08, 2017
That sibling bond has been on the back burner for a while…I think the last positive moment they had before this episode was somewhere in the first few episodes of season 3.
mellafe
May 08, 2017
Word is they might do a timejump so we’ll see.
peterspoor33
May 06, 2017
Woooofah! Great Recap! After the end of last episode where Octavia is like “What’s a conclave? I’m just here to kill a bunch of people” this episode seriously just got knocked up a notch. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o4BOZcDMw_A
peterspoor33
May 06, 2017
OMG – Kane, Bellamy and then Indra visit Octavia, incrementally sentimental to heavy heart bursting… stuff, (thanking the heavens Riley didn’t show up and give a pep talk).
You had the Mattel range of Conclave Hero action figurines doing their ceremony thing and then boom – Luna shows up and throws a humongous gorilla sized “crazy spanner” in the works. I mean maybe if she was gonna flood the bunker and fill it with dolphins or something, but she was just like “Game over bitches!”. I expected someone to boo her (but not surprised no-one did either)
I’m like damn you Echo for Ilian, then she gets banished and I’m like “awww” (What’s that about?)
How was that Luna grounder kill where she charges the guy, basically julienne’s him like a carrot and catches his conclave tag on her spear in one single slash, like some surreal economy of movement thingy. Was drowning Roan excessive? I guess it’s all good if the death quip you make lands, I guess she returned you to water Ice King [sip].
Episode Ranking: Priceless
Can’t argue Clarke was right to take the bunker but it was such a shock to learn that I felt like I was one of the angry suckers that just got grifted.
Adventure B squad are so high on nuts right now
Raven and Hallucination-Becka are likely having a blorfing good time doing their rocket pre-start checks.
Klaussays
May 08, 2017
Luna went BEAST mode in this ep..Both in her words and the beatings she dished out..
With you on Echo. I was like ‘Bitch’ when she killed Illian but wanted to give her a hug when she got banished.
peterspoor33
May 09, 2017
Yeah is there some psychological term or condition where you witness someone with a history of betrayal up and murder someone good unjustly in cold blood, but then 5 minutes later you feel all kinds of sorry for them when their feelings are hurt?
Only days from the end of the world?
I should be all “Whatever – life and its dramas are meaningless in the face of extinction.”
nickmoose
May 06, 2017
Six Things:
1. This episode was literally the best.
2. I’m gonna miss Roan.
3. Luna, the de facto villain of this episode, ended up being TOTALLY CORRECT about humanity sucking! That speech she gave, about how even she would still choose to save herself instead of her brother, DIRECTLY mirrored what Clarke and Jerkha (The De facto heroes) were in the process of doing at that exact same moment.
4. Every time I try to use the “Girl in the Floor” strategy while playing Laser Tag, I STILL suck at Laser Tag!!!
5. Man Nap is my favorite Crazy Ex Girlfriend song.
6. I’ll bet if you started dictating your recaps to a mutated gorilla instead of a monkey, the gorilla would be able to screen capture the fight scenes.
johnbakernes
May 05, 2017
That was awesome! I loved all of it, even Clarke’s uber screw up. There is no good news for Skaikru now folks! They followed Clarke into a hole and the blonde little nightblood brought Bellamy inside. I’ve watched this girl for awhile now and I find myself struggling not to smack myself at that. She has to know he would never leave his sister out there. Of course, maybe she was banking on Octavia biting the bullet but…. wow, just wow.
And here’s a question: while Clarke’s stealing the brass ring from the clans where is mama Griffin? I don’t see her leaving Kane to deep fry in the world gone microwave. This girl deserves an Oscar. She’s giving Octavia her little pep talk when all the time she’s thinking “Yep, girl’s toast. Let her live long enough to buy us time.” Clarke didn’t even blink. Not a hint that she was turning her back on everything she stood for throughout the whole season.
NOT HAPPY that Roan is dead. Not at all. Good point though is that Echo might be in charge of the Azgeda now. That girl was so sneaky, like a hot little ninja with a bow.
I will miss the Raven / Luna moments. Those two had something pathological there. Of course Raven’s hanging with imaginary Becka so I don’t think she minds too much.
As for poor Ilian, he was dead the day he saw Octavia. That girl has boyfriend issues: the terminal kind.
Wonder how Clarke is going to take it when she realizes that Octavia won? Of course in the preview for next week we saw nutty Jaha tell Clarke that if they open the door that they will be killed off. So I think that she’s going to find out real soon.
Klaussays
May 08, 2017
I think Jaha was going around Chloroforming people like Bellamy and Abby. I mean Murphy, Jackson, Miller and Emori are safe right? RIGHT?
I don’t think Clarke truly decided until Roan told her to fuck herself and Luna showed up. But the plan was definitely formulating in her mind when she spoke to Octavia.
Loralee_jk
May 05, 2017
Did anyone else notice!!!
The Grounder’s gave Skaikru the symbol from Charmed!!! 10 points!
#3rdTimesTheCharm #LifeIsCharmed #PowerOfThree #ClarkeBellamyOctavia #EveryoneElseMightDie
Loralee_jk
May 05, 2017
Octavia took Bellamy’s advice and waited to kill the last person.
I’m sad Roan died! There goes his political marriage to Luna and/or Clarke,
Mynamajeff
May 05, 2017
I am good! 😀
EmmaDanks0
May 05, 2017
When Roan kept giving Octavia side eye during the darkest participation ceremony I’ve ever seen and when Ilian came to stand beside her, for a moment I thought Season 5 was going to see a love-triangle between those three.
But with regards to the Indra-Octavia moment, while it was beautiful, I found issue with Octavia pointing out that if she won, Trikru would die because every time Clarke had come up with a solution this season she had been very vocal about saving ‘everyone’
The Kane-Blake family moment was everything I realized I’ve wanted for the last season and a half. I’m not even sure if I want Kane to be a biological parent to either sibling at the moment just a surrogate one.
I refuse to believe Roan is dead until I see them burning his corpse, not burying because then I’ll be waiting for him to dig his way out of his grave.
I think Clarke’s bunker idea makes sense. She gave the Grounder’s plenty of opportunities to share it, she even tried to make herself Commander so she could order them all in to survive and then found herself with a one in thirteen (fourteen?) chance of Skaikru getting into the bunker. And Octavia is awesome but I would not have been solely reliant on my chances for survival to be on a teen girl who had a year or two of training under her belt against grown men and women who were famed warriors. Roan was no longer making deals and Trikru hated her people for siding with Azgeda.
I think Clarke had simply exhausted every option she could think up at this point and, after a season of coming up with solutions only to have them catch fire, get broken or get tangled up in fighting, she just went with getting her people to survive.
Klaussays
May 08, 2017
Clarke’s decisiom wasn’t thaaat bad..It’s just after watching what everyone went through and the euphoria of Octavia’s victory and uniting the people speech it was especially frustrating..But unbelievably realistic, understandable and human. Shitty though.
Roan had too much honor for his own good..I liked him but he should have shut the fuck up last week and he would still be alive.
EmmaDanks0
May 09, 2017
It’s the way the writers have been going all season, they spend an episode finding The Solution and then in the last five minutes go ‘Ha ha, BURN IT ALL DOWN’
And Octavia’s victory was awesome and I’m hoping she becomes the new Commander, but Clarke should have had no reason to suspect that she would be able to unite the clans when Clarke herself had been failing to do it since first finding out about the nuclear meltdown.
Toni_watches May 05, 2017
Fair point. My initial reaction at the end of the episode was “DAMMIT, CLARKE!” But now that I’ve had some time to simmer, I realize she WAS bearing the burden so they don’t have to. Sure, it all worked out fine with Octavia, but I would be singing a different tune if Luna had won.
So fiiiiiiiine, Clarke is still the hero or whatever… uggghhhhhhh…
EmmaDanks0
May 05, 2017
Like, she’s a hero by the show’s standards and a villain by the standards of everyone else (including her own mother and her friends half the damn time)
I was initially pissed off too, along with almost every last person on Tumblr, but it’s not out of character for her or anything.
peterspoor33
May 09, 2017
I love the Jaha/Palpatine comparison, even Jaha’s wardrobe is a puzzler, why is he a former Chancellor (especially after his failed and destructive Exodus) still dressing like a Jedi/Monk/Moses? I mean, Kane has a funky jacket with epaulets etc. The grounders even had some striking strappy outfits for savages, Jaha’s robe is so passe. Will no-one on the Ark lend him any modern clothing? Is there no left over guard uniform he can decorate or add individual touches to?
EmmaDanks0
May 10, 2017
That is a good question. I assume the writers are trying to show how he still thinks himself to be the savior, but maybe he’s trying to show himself to be one of his people by not dressing as a leader or a guard, whereas Kane is the diplomat and the grounders tend to wear whatever they can scavenge, even Roan and Indra didn’t dress overly fantastic in comparison to the rest of their people.
Klaussays
May 08, 2017
I found a lot more tumblr people furious with Luna in this episode..
mellafe
May 08, 2017
And she usually gets what she wants, one way or another. She’d exhausted a bunch of way-outs, nothing worked, this was an extreme measure for sure but it’s not Un-Clarke like. My problem is Jaha, but then my problem is always Jaha, boring piece of s*t
EmmaDanks0
May 09, 2017
Jaha is the Palpatine luring Clarke to the Dark Side.
She’s reliant on him at the moment because he’s the only person left to her who doesn’t scream at her for making the hard decisions that nobody else would willingly make.
My issue with Skaikru and Clarke’s friends (Bellamy excluded) is that they’re all happy for her to save them but they want to keep their hands clean and not have to think about the consequences for her actions.
Emsie82
May 05, 2017
Uh yeah hi, i have a very extensive list of TV shows that i would really love if you could photo recap por favor????!! Yes?! Brilliant, you’re a real champ!
dbjean22
May 05, 2017
I’m numb to deaths on The 100, but I love you wringing out the “funny”. Great job! 😏
Snapegirl
May 05, 2017
As I watched the episode, character death after character death, I kept thinking “I hope Toni Watches is ok…” (’cause I wasn’t).
Thanks for the great recap that helps me come to terms with what happened! Or, at least starts the process (Roan, NOOOOOO!).
KendraNutt
May 04, 2017
All I have to say is this…
J’Accuse Clarke! J’Accuse! You have been hanging out with Jaha too long! (Imagine screaming and pointing at tv with a bag of Hershey chocolate chips in one hand)
I fully blame Jaha for this, you can’t tell me he wasn’t manipulating Clarke from the start! Clarke’s idea indeed! J’Accuse Jaha, J’Accuse!
Yes I might be a tiny weeny upset by this. Let’s hope Bellamy shoots Jaha a third and final time.
Klaussays
May 08, 2017
It was Clarke’s idea..Jaha was her footsoldier chloroforming people and the like.
KendraNutt
May 10, 2017
True it was Clarke’s idea but Jaha has been whispering in her ear all season, passively directing her to his line of thinking. He is currently the devil on her shoulder. I think Jaha would have preferred to leave Bellamy on the outside as he is a threat, but Clarke probably insisted he be brought in as a condition to the arrangement. Personally I think this show is more about the rise of the Blake siblings. Going from lower class citizens on the Ark to being the most influential and powerful among the clans. I would like to see Clarke fall from grace and lose her position and see how she handles that.
Klaussays
May 12, 2017
I can see a scenario where Clarke saves everyone as left to wander alone/or live in the mansion alone for 5 years as a nightblood.
Robespierre
May 04, 2017
Damn it, Echo, you minx. Ilian was cool. Remember when he blew up Arcadia and a bunch of people almost died? Lol, good times /s
But I do hope little O throws you off the cliff next time you meet.
She takes losing boyfriends very seriously, that little O. 😉
P.S.: if there’s ever a vote for reincarnation of Lexa and a new heda, O has my vote.
Luna was a complete lunatic this episode. Her being unaffected by black rain was creepy as hell.
I’m said Roan is gone. And I think he deserved a better death than being drowned in radioactive puddle. 😦 I wonder who will lead Azgeda now? Not Echo, right? That could be trouble.
And yeah, Clarke has officially crossed the line into super villain territory: she’s a nighblood wanheda with an army of goons hiding inside a secret high-tech bunker. Mountain men much?
Next thing you know she’ll go and unshackle some crazy AI. Jaha would be proud.
Klaussays
May 08, 2017
Echo’s redeeming quality of liking Bellamy will keep her alive a while longer. You felt nothing when Roan banished her?
Luna is a candidate with Octavia and Clarke for Episode MVP/performance. I didn’t think she was a lunatic though just a little crazy and homicidal:)
Robespierre
May 12, 2017
Luna-tic was a pun 🙂
But yeah, Echo was off my favorites list the moment she blew up mountain Weather. She’s a badass, sure, but likeable? Imo, no.
Klaussays
May 12, 2017
My inner Drax came out and it somehow flew over my head.
Echo is redeemable i think.
Robespierre
May 04, 2017
*sad. grrr… edit button…
LikeLike