Hey guys! Thanks for coming to my blog even though there wasn’t an episode again this week. SO BIZARRE how it was just a blank screen for 42 minutes, huh? Like, NOTHING upsetting happened because nothing happened at all. I mean, it’s a weird choice, but I’ll accept it. So I guess we can just discuss, I dunno, the state of the world or something? That could be fun?
So, how ‘bout that global pandemic…?
UGH FINE, you guys, I am UPSET. Sheid is now the boss of Wonkru, our fierce warrior queen Indra is on the cusp of death, our glorious, beloved Diyoza is now a crystal giant, and I don’t even want to talk about it, leave me ALONE! (please never leave me alone)
YOU GUYS, how ARE you? How does one properly say goodbye to a character who won our hearts so completely, so instantly?
We were NOT, madam. We were not prepared for how much you would mean to us, and to the story. Can you name a journey as wild as Diyoza’s? Can you name a relationship that made as much shockingly beautiful sense as her bond with Octavia? Can you name another character in the history of television who was somehow endearing while scooping a man’s eye out with a soup spoon? YOU SIMPLY CANNOT. So, thank you, Ivana Milicevic, for everything you brought to Diyoza, and everything you did for OUR HEARTS.
Apparently Sheid didn’t completely massacre all of the Faithful, because there were a bunch still alive, either slowly bleeding out, or just sort of lightly roughed-up? It DEFINITELY seemed like he killed everyone last episode. Sheid isn’t exactly an, “I’ll just defend myself as much as necessary,” type of guy, so I was very shocked to see Sympathetic Dad, the Beautiful Creepster’s new best friend, still alive. He was all, “hey, guy I met a few weeks ago who lied to me SO HUGE, please, if I don’t make it, take care of the fruit of loins, my only child…” and Murphy was like, “no?” Hahaha, I know it was because he was like, “but you will live, ‘Ponine, dear God above,” but still. Weird moment.
Anyway, they figured out that Sheid (like the rest of the known universe) wanted to hang out with Madi, so they skedaddled off to chaperone.
He let her know that A) he was the monster who haunted her every waking moment last season, and B) he wanted to be buds. Basically, he couldn’t kill her without strengthening Indra’s claim as leader (martyrs aren’t good for business), but he DID need her to bend the knee, or he would brutally torture and murder every person she has or will ever care about. Just a super great foundation for a budding friendship.
Clarke negotiated the release of her pals in exchange for her super-legit key-pabilities (love me for me), but Echo, Octavia and Diyoza were like, “thanks but no thanks” and peaced out. So Clarke was like, “yeah, that’s a ruse FOR SURE”, and instead asked for some girl time, NO (straight) BOYS ALLOWED.
It did strike me as odd that Gabriel took orders from Clarke considering they met for a hot minute last season where HE saved HER, but whatever, it’s about time Clarke did some Clarke-ing, ya know? So they huddled up (LOL) and very quickly figured out that their pals were up to some shenanigans because they hadn’t told anyone that Clarke was only the key for a fun afternoon. So she told B-Squad to stay with the season’s big bad and the magical subway sphere.
Echo went to collect Hope to take her to Prisonville, but TWIST, she instead stabbed the guard in the throat and freed Hope. She was playing everyone all along! What a… shock? You guys, get out those steak knives because I’ve got some beef. Why ON NOT-EARTH would Echo go so deep undercover that she wouldn’t tell any of her pals about her plans? Even if she truly believed they were being watched at all times (which it seems they weren’t), the conversation they had last episode where they coached Hope to hide her feelings would not look good!
And why now? Did she need to be a Level 2 to get access to the crystal goop? But they were clearly in there before… and she could’ve jumped Levitt at any time (how dare you). I just… I have so many questions, and I think all the answers boil down to this: everything Echo said and did was for our benefit. It was to make us believe she had turned. It was to confuse us. It was to give us this reveal. As an audience member, I don’t love feeling cheaply played.
I don’t know, maybe I’ll feel differently after some time (unfortunately the nature of recapping this show is that you guys always get my knee-jerk reactions), and maybe the rest of the season will build on this, but right now, I didn’t love it, I’M SORRY.
Anyway, she told Hope to get all the main characters off the planet in one hour, then hopped off to enact her revenge for Bellamy’s accidental ‘death’.
They raced to find Madi, and after an heart-warming moment where Murphy reassured her that everything was totally cool, Sheid overtook the airwaves and started aggressively spilling beans all over the damn place. Wonkru looked pretty interested before Indra made them do their chores or whatever.
Gabriel and Call Me Bill had a chat acknowledging each other as quasi-immortal false-Gods who have seen centuries pass, and Call Me Bill was like, “Remember Hot Pockets?” and Gabe was like, “I preferred Pizza Pops,” then Bill was like, “the fact that you know the difference means we are the same, you and I,” and then he showed them some fancy Tetris. Apparently it was left behind by the O.G. Bardonites, and it’s what Bill & Co. used to predict the upcoming war to end all blah blah blah. Then he peaced out for lunch (hahaha, boy does not give a single eff anymore), and Gabriel chased after him all, “it better not be Hot Pockets!”
You guys, look, I loved all of this – the Clarke/Octavia reunion, both of them honouring the other’s grief, the Adventure Squad meeting Hope, all of it was beautiful, and something I’ve been waiting for for a while. So when I say that Octavia’s hug with Miller dwarfed everything in this scene, you KNOW how much it meant to me. He hadn’t seen her since they arrived on Planet Season 6, and he had carried his guilt and resentment that whole time, believing himself to be complicit in her “crimes”. He was, if not her right hand, then maybe her right pinky finger? He spent 6 years under her command. He spent 6 years protecting and being protected by her. He spent 6 years standing by her side. Where Bellamy was Clarke’s knight, Miller was Octavia’s. I have YEARNED for this with my every breath. It’s not the admission I wanted (that perhaps she wasn’t all wrong, and that she did keep them all alive), but it’s a start, and witnessing it made my heart explode.
Anyway, Hope broke up the reunion with some news that they had to vamoose, and everyone was like, “um, whyyyyyyyy?” and she was all, “no reason, it’s not like Echo is going to mass murder everyone,” and Octavia rolled her eyes, all, “ugh, Echoooooo!”
Diyoza was like, “mass murder isn’t the soothing balm you think it is, maybe just chill with your family and heal your heart with a lil’ love and affection?” But Hope was like, “not into it,” and whatever, I’m fine, *sniff* I SAID I’M FINE.
I wish I could say this was the most uncomfortable first date I’ve seen with my own eyes, but I was a server for 7 years, so. Call Me Bill sat down to a very fancy lunch (does Bardo have house elves?) with food from the past, and tried to sweet-talk his fellow false-God into stanning him or something. I honestly couldn’t concentrate with Call Me Bill talking with his mouth full. Like, he’s been alive for centuries, surly someone would have told him to chew with his mouth closed?
Anyway, Gabe was like, “I like being legit human, though,” and Call Me Bill was like, “YOU ARE TRIGGERING MY TRAUMA, I mean *ahem* emotions are dumb.” He seemed pretty convinced that he’ll get some sort of cosmic do-over once the “last” war has been won, so there are no consequences for the current life he’s living. Nothing dangerous about that!
I would like to take this opportunity to congratulate the casting director on this one. Did they plan all this? Did they know they’d be bringing back John Pyper-Ferguson for a much larger role? Or did they just get lucky that the day-player they hired is very good at his job?
Echo effing LAID HANDS on my sweet boy, and I swear to Ice Cream, if this has done permanent damage to my ship… *deep breath*. Echo straight-up murdered two Bardonites in front of our sweet naive beautiful baby, and he cracked and told her how to use the bedazzler. I guess logic leaves the body when being tortured, because that meant she could kill ALL your people, but we’ll forgive you, Levitt, you gorgeous dumb-dumb.
Anyway, they all (including his one true love Octavia) left him tied up because if the guards got involved, they would kill their pal. I mean, couples have been through worse on this show, right? Remember that time Echo stabbed Bellamy’s sister off a cliff? Remember that time Mackson ate people? Remember that time Kane zapped Abby with a zappy-stick? All I’m saying is, this is not insurmountable, and our ship may yet sail *crosses fingers so hard*.
Jordan Jasper Green, being the adorable lil’ genius he is, postulated that Call Me Bill is a big dumb dummy who doesn’t know how to play Tetris. He figured if the language is like Korean, then it could be slotted into characters (that read vertically), and could instead mean “test” instead of “war.” Ohhhhhhhh, HUGE IF TRUE! Is that where Becca went? Did she fail the test? Did she even take it? Did she see that it was a test, and was like, “I didn’t study, this is my literal worst nightmare.”
Sheid went ahead and did the Grounder ritual that made him the Commander again no-take-backsies, but Indra was all, “Take-backsies!” and he was like, “I clearly just said NO take-backsies,” but she was like, “fancy a fight to the death?” and he was like, “more than you will ever know.”
Look, a day ago, Sheid had Russell-hair, and now he has a mohawk-ponytail, and all I’m saying is that some silver fox out there woke up without his tresses.
Anyway, in a very tense and awesome and distressing scene that had me clenching my jaw and muttering, “don’t you dare show, don’t you even try to dare,” Indra and Sheid fought. Though she was awesome in every way, she still ended up on the losing end, and was about to be killed, BUT THEN…
Madi Arya Starked her way into the fight and slashed out Sheid’s eye, saving Indra, only to be almost immediately killed. Indra was all, “hey quit it,” and gave him a lil’ bow to make him spare Madi’s life, which hurt every molecule in my body, but also lit it aflame with hope and love? Remember when Indra was all, “I was ashamed of my mother for kneeling,” and now she’s kneeling for a child she loves. HUH. How ’bout that.
Anyway, then Madi skedaddled like the wily lil’ scamp she is.
Our girl passed out, (DON’T YOU EVEN DARE I STG), and Sheid was like, “reeeeeeeally gonna lean into this whole villain thing, and hunt down all the Faithful and their families and kill everyone, including kids and babies and pets and teddy bears probably.” Then that one troublesome Wonkruian was like, “is this a douche move?” and Sheid was like, “yes, and?” and the guy was all, “no prob, no prob, just clarifying,” then Sheid, AND THIS IS REAL – said, “good,” which in Grounderish was “Right on.” hahahahahahhahahhhahahah forever and ever, I will love this moment for the rest of my days. Someone please gif it. Or meme it. Do some kids-these-days thing with it, so that I may keep this moment forever, I beg of you.
Remember when this guy was lying there dying and asked the Beautiful Creepster to raise his son for him, and now he’s got a lil’ bandage on his noggin and is walking around giving exposition? What a fun treat for him.
Anyway, our favourite heart-of-gold scoundrel team-up hid Madi and the Faithful in the reactor, and Emori was all, “you’re a true hero now, dude,” and I was like, “DO NOT JINX IT, IF HE DIES, UGH.”
Welp. Echo almost went full Finn. I’m glad she didn’t go through with it, but if the Squad hadn’t been there, she likely would have. She would’ve killed an entire civilization for not even very justifiable revenge. They didn’t mean to “kill” Bellamy. It wasn’t deliberate. It was a dying soldier’s last act.
I have loved Echo since we first met her in a cage. I have loved her complexity, her fierce loyalty, and her quippy sass. I have loved Tasya Teles’ portrayal, and I wish I could connect with her now, in the show’s final stretch. I’m just not resonating with her motivations, and half the time, I’m not even sure what those motivations are.
Perhaps this will all come together in the end, perhaps I’ll look back and think, “ohhhhhh, THAT’s why!” Perhaps I’ll eat my hat. I truly, truly, hope I have to eat my hat (it’s made of chocolate, I shouldn’t wear it anymore).
Yay, Raven used their sister-bond from the ring to convince her not to do it, and then the episode ended, and they went on a picnic. Not a very The 100 ending, but it’s what happened, so get off my back about it.
Don’t make me.
Anders caught them and was like, “seriously guys, must you be the absolute worst?” and Hope was like, “yep!” and slashed his throat! Then she caught the bedazzler goop and was about to drop it into the water, when…
Everything about this scene was hauntingly, heart-crushingly beautiful. Diyoza, our amazingly fierce, wise, gorgeous warrior, caught the goop with her hand and was bedazzled as Octavia dragged a sobbing Hope out of the room. As she crystalized, she was all, “smarten up,” and the episode ended with Hope screaming “mommy” against the door.
How dare you, basically. Like, what did our hearts ever do to you, huh, The 100? HUH?
Diyoza’s death felt so damn earned. Her dying to prevent her daughter from becoming a mass murder just feels so RIGHT.
Here’s the thing, you guys, there are elements of this show that I’m not jiving with at the moment, BUT, I’m still invested, I’m still intrigued, and I’m still ride or die for our Adventure Squad +. There has never been an episode where I didn’t want to keep watching. There’s never been a time in this show’s history when I didn’t want to know what happened next. That hasn’t changed.
The 100 may stumble from time to time (what show doesn’t), but when it comes to finales, it has never let me down. I trust that it’ll stick this final finale. I think it has earned the benefit of the doubt by now.
- Ivana Milicevic is a legend, I hope to see her on my television (read: computer) screen again soon. Thank you for what you brought to this show!
- When Russel held the knife close to Picasso, I SAW RED. If Picasso doesn’t make it through this series, I SWEAR TO CANADIAN LEGEND CÉLINE DION I WILL RIOT. *takes dramatic rattling breath*
- When Echo was like, “If they had killed YOU, Bellamy would be killing errrrrrrybody,” and I was all, “Remember last season when they DID kill Clarke, and Bellamy negotiated with them anyway for the sake of his people? Heh. Memories are weird.”
- “In other words, get the flock out of here.” Miller used my joke! Or… I used his joke, considering this was filmed a while ago? Either way, we share one mind, and now Miller, Jackson and I are a married tercet? *whispers* finally…
- “Let’s see what the three most dangerous women on this or any planet are up to.” I see what you were doing there, but that’s just not how people talk.
- Hey guys, what’s Gabriel’s DEAL? He’s obviously Team Adventure Squad, but like, why? He lied for months, but to what end? To protect whom? I really like his character, and obviously Chuku Modu is a total dreamboat, but I would very much like to know what’s driving this dude.
- Echo listing the Squad’s names to Hope as if she’d ever met them before made me chuckle.
- The only thing on my vision board is a picture of Adina Porter as Indra with a shaved head and a boss-ass-bitch glint in her eye.
- Speaking of hair – Jordan having blond highlights – a nod to Harper? That’s… that’s not how hair works, but I guess I’m okay with it? My heart doesn’t know yet.
- Next episode is going to be Bellamy-centric. Obviously I’m excited for his return, but I’m also nervous for how this is going to play out. No pressure, but by the end, I want to be saying to myself, “yup, that was worth it.”
- Calliope PramFleimkepa – so she didn’t take the flame!?! Call Me Bill stopping himself from asking what that meant, already suspecting his daughter isn’t inside anyone’s head.
- Jordan being the one to be like, “war isn’t great, though,” feels right.
- Yes, I am currently living in South Korea, and yes, I am learning Korean, and yes, I did take this opportunity to try translating, “I’m an adorable genius,” all by myself like a big girl, without the aid of google or anything. Anyone fluent in Korean who can tell me how I did?
- Anders taking Gabe’s gun like it was his lunch money was so embarrassing. I was so embarrassed for him.
- Now that Sheid doesn’t have to act like Russell, I am LOVING how hard JR Bourne is leaning into it. And why yes I DO love his makeover, thanks for asking, men in eyeliner DO IT FOR ME.
- Call Me Bill’s birkenstocks, LOL forever.
- Thanks to all who guessed, but last week’s JOKES FROM THE PAAAAAST was a bit of a hard one:
OKAY THANKS FOR COMING NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN STAY SAFE OUT THERE!