GGGGHHHHHHHAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH someone get me a damn chamomile tea, because my heart is RACING. Shit went down. And up. And then down again. You guys, I thought Abby was going to die, I thought Indra was going to die, and Kane, and Monty, Bryan and Miller, Murphy and Bellamy, and everyone. I thought everyone was going to die this episode. AND I LOVED IT. That’s the thing about stakes, ammiright? This show has ALL OF THE STAKES, because it consistently follows through on its threats. There are no more stakes left over for any other show. The 100 took them all.
IS Indra dead? Maybe. Is Kane? ALSO MAYBE. Is Roan? It sure seems like it, but unless he dies on screen, it didn’t happen. Just in case, though… *long moment of silence for his abs…*
This was the part 1 of the season finale, so obviously everything had to go wrong. Oh Adventure Squad, you’re so cute, thinking your adorable plan was going to work and everything would be totally fine in the PART 1 of a finale. Hahahahahaha… it’s like they don’t know they’re characters in a show that still has an episode left. Idiots.
What a fun disaster of a ride! You guys know how much I love it when all hope seems lost. And I mean… hahaha, MAN, all is hope is so lost. It’s like, Room of Requirement lost. It’s like the nightly deposit money at the beginning of Empire Records, where he goes to Vegas and bets it all. It’s more lost than Oceanic Flight 815. What’s going to happen????? I think it’s finally time to take advantage of that Time Lord I befriended at a Tim Horton’s one time, and have him jump me one exact week into the future so I can watch the exciting conclusion to this horrifically violent romp.
But before I do that, let’s photo recap!
The episode picked up from the total despair left over from Red Sky at Morning, when they were kicked out of Luna’s groovy commune.
No one wanted to go into random villages trying to I-spy nightbloods, so Clarke tantrumed into the woods, where a certain red-dressed Age of Ultron was waiting. Luckily, the coolest Ice King since the Kool-Aid man was there!
Roan tried to take the flame and peace out, but Bellamy showed up.
You guys know that all I have ever wanted for Bellamy is a bromance where his buddy doesn’t try to murder a little girl, or go bonkers, or get shot in the head. Let’s for a second imagine a world where Bellamy and Roan are best friends, living together in a cabin, talking about girl troubles while chopping wood….. hmmmm…. what? Oh, right. Then Bellamy shot him in the arm because that’s how boys bond, and they brought him along on their road trip. Yay!
Seriously, you guys, the friendship sparks were flying in this scene. They convinced Roan to help them get the goop out of Ontari before putting the flame in. Roan was SO down for that. I think this dude is bored of being king of the Ice Cube, and just wants an old fashioned adventure. He came to the right place!
It was time to move out, and the Adventure Squad was giving me exactly what I love, which is HUGS. So many hugs, you guys. I think the one that made my heart explode the most was…
Remember in season 2 when Raven was basically the Daryl Dixon to Clarke’s Rick Grimes? I miss that. These two ladies kick so much ass. I didn’t realize until this moment how much I miss them together.
Anyway, then our seeing-balls were filled with the image of a total creeper.
ALIE is in one of our Adventure B-Squad!! BUT WHO??
A-Squad reached Polis and came up with the plan that Clarke will pose as Roan’s prisoner, and Bellamy was NOT happy about it.
Back at Arkadia, Jasper and Monty were having their own bromance bonding sesh.
Jasper stabbed Monty because he took the Matrix Cracker! I truly, truly want to know what it tastes like. Anyway, Monty ran back to Raven (as any sane human would do in a scary situation), and they tried to contact the Squad.
Alas, all of the wires that ever existed had been cut by Jasper, the wily little scamp! So our beloved Adventure Squad was walking into a trap. WHAT FUN!!
The INSTANT Miller and Bryan started being sappy I assumed one of them was going to break our hearts and die. DON’T YOU DARE, SHOW! *sniff* Don’t you dare.
Anyway, then a half-goateed butt-face slithered out of the shadows and tried to get the flame.
Roan tried to get Clarke out of there, so Kane shot him.
Like I said, he was carried away still breathing, so he may still make it to the game for beers with Bellamy.
So Jasper took the chip because there’s no hope for humanity. Ugh, YEAH KID, that’s the point of a Part 1. Duh! Once again, it’s like he doesn’t know there’s another episode coming! They better get the Matrix Goop out of him, because I want Jokey Jasper returned to us pronto.
Meanwhile, Clarke was strapped to a pole while Abby tried to extract all the world-ending secrets.
She stabbed Clarke in the chest a few times with a scalpel. Just your typical mother-daughter stuff.
ALIE’s minions were dragging Bellamy away to join the fun upstairs when a beautiful, creepy angel appeared.
It’s like the writers of this episode saw my vision board!! You guys know I live for character reunions. It’s been months since these people have seen our beloved Beautiful Creepster. Remember back in season 1 when all Murphy yearned for was a big-brother-type relationship with Bellamy? Perhaps THIS bromance shall be rekindled? They can get past that time Murphy tried to hang him, right? I just love every dynamic on this show. All of them. Every character combination is a dream. *happy sigh*
The reunion with Pike’s Stupid Face was tense and delicious and every time Octavia even glanced his way this episode, my heart fluttered. Pike is a bad dude, you guys. He’s a gross, awful, stupid-faced bad dude who they have to work with, and I am LOVING it! The tension is marvelous. I simply can’t wait for his inevitable comeuppance.
Delightful! AAAANNNNNYYYWWWAAAAYYYYYY… they decided to go up the tower because they are all magnificent heroes.
Indra and Octavia had a touching moment where they decided that home was within Octavia all along, and all she had to do was click her heals together three times. It was, however, interrupted by a dreamy minion with soulful eyes who started shooting up the place, which resulted in a very thrilling elevator fight!
Back at Arkadia, Jasper was rattling off all the awesome deaths from season 1. “Drew, ninja star to the face. That was a good one.” That WAS a good one! Raven naturally got all the whatsits to work, but then Jasper knocked out Harper.
Monty’s romance with Harper is cute, but also verrrrrry convenient for this story!
Back at Polis, Abby was taking a different approach to try and crack Clarke.
This was very upsetting to watch. Very. Upsetting. How is Clarke not an insane person after the hell-ride that was these past three seasons?
The Squad set the bomb and were happily climbing, when a certain dream-boat woke up and wandered into the literal line of fire like a toddler. Indra, the glorious, brave hero, jumped down and saved him… ?? Maybe? UGH THIS SHOW!
Then Jaha used Ontari’s head for batting practice, and it was CRAZY. *shivers* Clarke kneeled down into her splattered brains and figured out she was brain damaged. No Matrix Bug for her!
What a pickle!! Adventure A-Squad is trapped in Polis with no way out, surrounded by mindless minions, and with no plan for victory. Adventure B-Squad is being terrorized by a NON jokey Jasper who has Monty’s true love Harper at gunpoint. Octavia is in the same room as Pike’s Stupid Face, all the grown-up heroes are in the matrix, and a bunch of our heroes are nursing gunshot wounds.
Don’t you just love it!!! I truly don’t know of any other show that sets up the hopeless, violent, possible-world-ending, soul-crushing dominos like this. Of course there are other shows with high stakes, but The 100 does it with such STYLE! It dangles our hearts over a cliff, and we truly do not know if it will drop them or not.
So delicious. Very, very, super pumped for next week, you guys!
- High-five to H2gold for calling it on Jasper’s chiped-ness.
- SO MANY MOUTH GAGS!
- “You got a real gratitude problem, you know that?” – Oh Roan, I hope you’re not dead. We’ll miss you and your banter. And by banter, I of course mean your abs, and the very real potential of being Bellamy’s best friend.
- Ohhhhhhhh, I get it now! Thaaaaaat’s why Monty and Harper randomly had sex out of nowhere last episode. It’s so that Monty would believably struggle with himself about opening the door, because he caaaaaaaaares about her. I’m pumped it happened, for sure. I would be remiss, however, if I didn’t point out that we still would have cared about Harper even without a romantic entanglement. She’s proven herself a valuable member of the Adventure Squad, and has spent a lot of time with these kids. I would believe that he wouldn’t want her to die, even if they didn’t sex each other up. But, like I said, NOT COMPLAINING.
- Let’s acknowledge that it was the Beautiful Creepster who saved Abby. What a little hero he’s turning out to be!
- If you could magically gift Bellamy with an epic bromance, who would it be with?
- Speaking of glorious friendships, Indra and Kane light up my life. Who do I have to pray to / bring ice cream to / kill to make sure they’re still alive for season 4? I know the episode has already been made, but I do have access to a Time Lord, so…
- So, if you’re a mind-controlled minion, and someone comes into a room and says, “If I were you I’d hit the deck”, and then one of the good guys yells, “everyone hit the ground!”… your first thought is to… stay standing? Is that in the mind-controlled minion handbook? Seems counterproductive, to be honest.
- Bellamy shot Jaha (again)!!! I don’t like how much Bellamy loves shooting people, but when his bullets land in Jaha, well, that’s something I can get behind. This show has made me so blood thirsty! Maybe I should watch videos of puppies to calm down. Hahaha… they think they’re people…
[Originally Posted May 2016 on tv.com]
One thought on “The 100 “Perverse Instantiation: Part One” Photo Recap – Thank You, But the Princess Is In Another Castle (3.15)”
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AcornArmy23 Jun 03, 2016
“Jasper stabbed Monty because he took the Matrix Cracker! I truly, truly want to know what it tastes like.”
Kind of minty, maybe? They look like they’d be minty. And covered in bacteria from half the world carrying them around with their bare hands.
eric357 May 19, 2016
Probably the best photo recap, for the shows I watch, that I have ever read. Thank you so much for your tireless commitment to excellence. Now I have to figure out some way to save this.
Oenc May 15, 2016
As Jasper was being such a dumbass, I wasn’t surprised he got chipped at Luna’s camp., It was kinda obvious he would, the way he was looking and after falling in love again after meeting a girl for 5 seconds. I won’t mind if they kill him now. He can’t come back from his character arc to be Monty and Jasper any more!
spudchick May 15, 2016
I know Monty asked Harper something to make sure she wasn’t chipped but honestly I still have my doubts. Yes, these have been keeping me on the edge of my seat! Kinda like Vikings does sometimes–I really ought to plan to watch them on the stationary bike on Saturday mornings since it juices me up so much.
Love you doing sock puppet theater with Broan 🙂
Most satisfying show this season!
Klaussays May 14, 2016
Harper is alive in the promo standing next to Raven and Monty….I can rest easy.
Jasper would be a good replacement for the guy who reads out the hunger games deaths
Bellmay shot Jaha another callback to season 1
Oenc May 15, 2016
“Bellmay shot Jaha another callback to season 1”
OMG love it! Didn’t realise but its so true!
Love this show!
Aleakim91 May 14, 2016
Miller is Bellamy’s best friend, clearly. 🙂
gradybridges99 May 14, 2016
Just a heads up but the Empire Record kid went to Atlantic City, not Vegas.
The best recaps. Ipanema!
H2gold May 14, 2016
I’ll take that high five on the basis that it’s almost as awesome as one of Jasper and Monty’s synchronised ones…I said almost!
I’m as excited for your recap of the finale just as much as I am for the show itself. You’ve brought so much more to my enjoyment of it: “Mutant Gorilla”, “dirty mouth gags”, ” adventure squad”, recurrent punning and of course the iconic ” beautiful creepster” to name but a few of your gems. Thank you for every last one.
KBeam May 14, 2016
I’m fully expecting Bryan and/or Miller (btw, it was weird to hear him called Nathan) to die next week after the talk about a house by the lake and raising chickens. Don’t they know it’s bad luck to make plans for the future at such a time?
MichelleHood24 May 14, 2016
Firstly IS ROAN DEAD, HES NOT DEAD, NOOOOO he better not be if he is I’m going to be pissed TEASING ISNT NICE writers of the show its mean, they can’t just give us this beautiful creature who’s character is full of so much rich potential and then take him away. Second Clarke was going to let Abby die now those two don’t have the strongest bond as it is they have so much pent up issues that really been addressed I’m thinking this little incident won’t go done well, also jaha and ALIE looked genuinely suprised by Clarkes choice. Third STUPID JASPER AHHHHHHHHHHHHH I can’t believe he stabbed monty, but I will admit chipped jasper was pretty funny when he was running through all the dead and how they died and who killed them. I really enjoyed this episode it was great it was nice to see Roan again and murphy God when did I start enjoying him. I really hope that Indra and Octavia can be the ones to kill pike he’s been shot so yehhh for that but I don’t want a heroic death for him he needs to die by octavias hand it’s what they both deserve.
nickmoose May 14, 2016
When would Jasper have been chipped? Was this supposed to have happened in the previous episode? Cuz that episode aired on the same night Civil War came out, so I was still buzzed from the post-movie drinking party my friends and I had to celebrate the awesomeness that was Civil War when I finally got around to watching the 100. Huge swaths of that episode are missing from my brain.
I remember there were dreadlocks and then everyone being sad.
MichelleHood24 May 14, 2016
He was chipped when Luna was being tortured on the oil rig.
nickmoose May 14, 2016
OK, I just thought of the perfect name for the Mountain King’s ghost band in the afterlife!! Wait for it…..”DEATH BY CLARKE”!!! ( exclamation points ad infinitum) So what’s the verdict!? Do I win the contest? What’s my prize? (I’m assuming it will be ice cream related. Can it be one of those Nutter Butter Dog cone things?)
Toni_watches May 14, 2016
By George, I think you’ve done it.
hahredux May 14, 2016
Thank you for another brilliant recap! Bellamy’s bromance! Murphy the savior! I totally expected one of the pictures to have “death by Clarke” on it though. 🙂
Is it just me, or did they show more vials of the black stuff in the briefcase in the super-secret flamekeeper room? I keep waiting for Murphy to remember it and for Clarke to inject herself with it… I feel like they showed Becca injecting herself for a reason.
And I think Roan might be alive… but maybe chipped. In the preview, I think there was a gentleman in a very dapper coat that looked like him. It flashed by so quickly I wasn’t sure though.
I’ve gotten husband to watch the show with me now and he’s waiting for the season to end with Clarke et al killing a mass of people again…
daisymae2u May 14, 2016
I love your recaps and this one was especially fab!
I believe that Miller and Bellamy should have a bromance that turns into an epic love triangle. Let Clarke be the one who’s like “what?” for a change. Also, I would love to see Wick run in (shirtless of course) and save the day for Raven and Monty. Where is he??? I love his banter among other things…
And I have to say: Abby was awesome at looking like a shell of a person. Her eyes really looked empty. Creeped me out.
Holding my breath for next week!
peterspoor33 May 13, 2016
[Octavia’s like;] Yeah Clarke, maybe we could put up some flyers for Nightbloods at the local villages to join our band… Sheesh!
So the 1st commander must of had a contingency [redundancy plan] for this exact situation or similar right? Perhaps a certain Nightblood Gorilla…. [kidding] of course Ontari is still alive, she’s sort of OK, only had most of her brain files deleted, but thankfully we got a chip with Lexa and former commanders operating systems just waiting for installation in some dented bloody hardware.
Did Roan and Clarke share the same mouth gag?
At this stage Raven has got to be all “Damn, do I also have to go get the motherboard myself just to avoid all this drama”
So I guess tomorrow morning the coffee shop in the City of Light is gonna have a bigger queue than usual.
Toni_watches May 14, 2016
mellafe May 13, 2016
I have zero power but if you want to give me ice-cream I will not complain. I swear.
I really wish I had a Raven to run to. These people are so damn lucky.
Tori, the on-going jokes -from your very first recap to this one- are made of gold!! These laughs are just what I need to get pumped for Friday night, when I don’t party but study! Life is tough.
Also, Murphamy. Give me all the Murphamy there is in the world. Please.
(File this under ‘stupid things I notice’ but Bryan -especially in the picture you used on this post- looks like Hiccup from How to Train your Dragon. Can’t unsee it).
Toni_watches May 13, 2016
BAAAAHAHAHAHA NOW I CAN NEVER UNSEE IT!!
mellafe May 13, 2016
*Toni. TONI. damnit.
KateSullivan May 13, 2016
You know, you mention mouth gags, and I get distracted by, how disgusting must those be? I mean, pretending they are real and not just carefully dirted ones.
Neomeris May 13, 2016
Lovely recap! The return of the puns was almost as lovely as how you’ve made Toni_watches’-Clarke react the way she should to someone stealing Lexa’s thunder.
Roan is alive. He’s alive. Nothing bad could happen to his (s)ass. And abs. Bryan on the other hand…
So, if you’re a mind-controlled minion, and someone comes into a room and says, “If I were you I’d hit the deck”, and then one of the good guys yells, “everyone hit the ground!”… your first thought is to… stay standing? Is that in the mind-controlled minion handbook? Seems counterproductive, to be honest.
I think Alie was distracted and considering she is the one giving all the orders… The poor mind-controlled minions are called that way for the simple reason that they don’t a have a first thought. 🙂
Who else squeed at the realization that back in s1 Bellamy was the bad guy for shooting Jaha and that at the end of s3 he’s the good guy for doing the same? 😉
Sorry, which Time Lord do you have access to?
H2gold May 14, 2016
Ha! I missed that connection regarding Bellamy and it’s exactly why this show is so perfect.
I am hoping it’s the oft overlooked and vastly underappreciated 9th Doctor.