Well you guys, here we are. It’s the second episode of season 4, and already the people of the Ark know that they’re living in a giant microwave. How are you guys feeling? Still buzzing in the afterglow of having our beloved Squad return to our screens last week? Were you so happy to see everyone again that you don’t give an eff about the plot, and would watch them play Jenga for a full hour?
This episode had a lot going on, but at the same time, not a lot going on. Ya know? It was very exciting and entertaining, with no major plot surprises. WHICH IS NOT A COMPLAINT. They have six months before they’re baked potatoes, it can’t be all major plot bombs all the time. Plus, this is episode 2, they have to build up to it, implement a…slow burn. Hahahaha *sigh*.
The dominoes are being set up nicely for this glorious shit-storm of a season. Lots of things happened that I’m guessing will come back to bite our Squad in the ass. *cough* Octavia *cough*.
In classic The 100 form, lots of people died, other people sexed, secrets were revealed, leaders lied and someone took a shower! OH, OH, and we were gifted with shiney new characters. I’m intrigued by this Ilian, and I hope he sticks around to either fall in love with or try to kill Octavia. But more importantly… Riley! Remember Riley?!? He was the one who did that thing, in the story about that other stuff?
Anyway, let’s all calm down about the return of Riley (OMG RILEY), and photo recap. This delightfully violent romp began with some characters altogether new to us! It was typical family drama, a teen acting out for attention, testing boundaries, that kind of thing.
Look who it is!! ALIE! It’s ALIE, you guys! I was NOT sad to see her go at the end of last season, so I was very shocked at how happy I was to see her in this episode. Was it nostalgia for a simpler, less radioactive time? Maybe. But it was also cool to see how the matrix chip affected those who aren’t top-billed. Also, this new kid is trouble and I’m pumped.
Then ALL OF OUR HEARTS AND LOINS EXPLODED because Abby and Kane were DOING IT. Sweet honey badger that was so satisfying. Three seasons of beautifully electric sexual tension was WORTH IT. Anyway, Abs got all weird about her wedding ring from when she was married to a melted version of a Greek God that she accidentally murdered, and Kane was so cool about it.
Love these two!
Then we were privy to a VERY private conversation that happened in the middle of some kind of public evening market.
Octavia, you little gremlin! Stop eavesdropping on people’s very private conversations that they have in public! Let’s be clear – Octavia totally decided to murder this guy there and then, right? #OctaviaLovesMurder
Anyway, because she loves murder so much, she went to Roan to let him know what’s up.
I am LOVING (and am a terrified of) new Octavia. Not that she wasn’t awesome before, but right now this girl is a loose cannon, and I am sensing a real Riggs & Murtaugh thing brewing with her and Kane. Anyway, they told Roan that someone wants to meet him outside in the parking lot, and he was all, “no big.”
Meanwhile, the Adventure Squad was back at Ark Camp, having a brainstorming sesh on how to stop the world from melting.
Monty stared at the water-collecting bucket for so long that I thought he was going to turn around and say they should live in buckets. Or build a giant bucket. Or wear buckets as hats, which we’ve ALL done, don’t pretend you haven’t. Turns out his real plan was go back to Season 1’s problems – not enough resources to keep people alive in the ark. That’s cool, it’s better than season 4’s current problems!
Bellamy scampered to recruit Brian and Miller (because he ain’t no fool, and also Brian is the only one who knows how to get there).
This was accidentally a very sexy scene. What happened? Don’t ask me! I was very distracted. I do know Brian was all, “you’re the light of my life, but maybe Pike was great?” And Miller responded, “YOU are the light of MY life, but for sure Pike was terrible.”
Then, for the first time in The 100 history, someone took a shower!!
Where ON EARTH did Jasper get an old lady shower cap??????
As it turns out, Jasper is back to being hilarious, but NOT in the adorable way he was in season 1, more in the ‘balls to the wall we’re all gonna die so eff it’ kind of way. Very dark stuff going on here guys, verrrry amusingly dark stuff. Either way, welcome back, Jokey Jasper! He wanted no part in the Adventure Squad this week, and I don’t really blame him. You do you, Kid!
Side note – he was all, “I’m not going to kill myself”, so does that mean he and Monty already had the talk? Did Monty get to read his obviously calligraphic suicide farewell? I super duper want to know what was in that note! I imagine it’s mostly crayon drawings of anthropomorphic fruit holding hands.
Then Raven warned Monty of the foreshadowing, *cough* I mean, explosive nature of the water cooler, and Bellamy tried to convince Clarke to come with them because he can’t bear to be away from her for more than a few minutes, or something.
Even though the trip was basically tailored to Clarke’s pastimes, she stayed behind to growl at lists, while the Squad ran into some new pals.
This lady was a total jokester. She made it seem like everything was peachy, when it was not, in fact, at all peachy. The Ice Cream Brigade tied up the Squad and brought them to their leader.
Well, that was easy!
Back at Ark Camp Raven and Clarke were exchanging girl-power-ups and I could not get enough.
Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!
Love these two. But their empowering love-a-thon was interrupted by a guy with a new haircut, and apparently a new personality chip.
NOPE! No, sorry, but no, I don’t care how many haircuts this guy gets, or how full his stupid goatee is, I will never not roll my eyes when he enters the frame of my television screen. Remember when he THREW A TEEN INTO THE MOUTH OF A SEA MONSTER? Remember when he ran off on an insane quest for self-importance and brought about a global war resulting in countless deaths, and the ill-will of everyone on earth towards Skaikru? Remember when he was a total butt-face??
I’m sorry, guys, I will never not rant about the inevitable redemption arc the show is trying to force this horrible, selfish guy into. JUST NO. Anyway, he EVER SO SELFLESSLY offered his help in repairing the ship. *huge injury-inducing eye-roll* and Raven told him to sort screws or something. Love that girl.
Back in the Ice Cube, the Squad discovered that old Farmville players were being kept as slaves.
It’s RILEY, you guys!
Meanwhile Roan and Echo were training for the big fight, and Abby was just chilling out watching them like some lazy personal trainer who spends her session playing candy crush and yelling out monotone motivational slogans.
This basically came down to Abby being a downer, Echo being all, “put me in, Coach!” and Roan being all, “you guys are getting on my last nerve.” He’s going to fight to show his strength, even though it’ll likely kill him. Typical! Then he told Echo the truth about the terrifying pre-apocalypse they’re currently living in.
Echo did NOT buy it!! And now she’s gonna head to Ark Camp to try and prove it wrong. Who knows what kind of zany hijinx she’ll get up to while she’s there! Is it weird how badly I want her to encounter Jasper? I really feel like those two would be an explosive pair right now. Picture it – him, singing in the shower, her, lusting for blood… what a rom com!
Meanwhile, Kane being Kane, he took a stab (yes that’s a foreshadowy pun) at diplomacy.
This did not go well. Octavia was VERY intense, and I loved every second of it.
Also not going well? Clarke’s solo manic freak out about how to save everyone all the time in every dimension and every universe. She got distracted by the strange, unfamiliar sounds of joy, and went to investigate.
For real – and I am very serious about this – can a super fan please go through all the seasons and count how many times Clarke has smiled? Anyway, Jasper told her to tell everyone the truth and she was all, “mayyyyyyyybe.”
Meanwhile at the Ice Capades, the Adventure Squad was making a very tough decision; take the water cooler back to Ark Camp and ensure the survival of hundreds, or blow it up and save roughly a handful of people.
They simply CAN’T leave Riley! Not after everything he’s done for them. Not after the bond they’ve forged! The show cut away leaving us in suspense as if they WEREN’T going to save the star of this show, Riley. Sure, show. Suuuuuure. Anyway, the Squad killed everyone in there who wasn’t Skaikru and then (with a nod to Riley, of course) Monty freed the slaves to allow them to brutally murder someone.
Look, I get it, Iceland is scary, and some of the Ice Skaters are bad hombres (yeah, I went there), but does that mean our “heroes” can just go around killing them? The subject of negotiation came up, right? I realize they were being moved, but not killed. Roan, THE ICE KING probably could have gotten them out of there without blowing up a bunch of people and also the key to the human race’s survival, right? And I know Bellamy wants to make up for last season when he irrationally and impulsively got a bunch of people killed. So to do that he essentially orchestrated an act of war during a very precarious time of peace. Cool, cool, cool, good start, Bro.
I would like to clarify that this is once again NOT A COMPLAINT! The 100 has never sugar-coated the dark side of humanity, and constantly puts our precious Adventure Squad in impossible moral quandaries. I adore the fact that the people we love and root for make both good and bad decisions… just awful, terrible, life-threateningly stupid decisions. Huzzah for layers!
Nope. Sorry. This guy is the pits.
Kane and Abby parted ways after she tossed her stupid old wedding ring necklace of regret in the damn trash and he was like, “we’re totally going steady now.” Then we got a fun peek into Octavia’s night-life.
YUP! Octavia shoved a knife into his ear and then wiped away the blood so no one could tell he had been brutally and craftily murdered. When he didn’t show up at the staff meeting, Roan announced that “his heart stopped”. Hahaha, YES, WELL, hearts tend to stop when someone has been IMPALED THROUGH THEIR BRAIN. And now Ilian is 100% onto her.
Good Lord, Octavia. Talk to somebody.
Back at Ark Camp the Squad returned with Riley and a few other unimportant people. Miller and Brian had a relationship-shaking disagreement that I cannot bring myself to snark at because it was too damn sad.
My heart!
Who the eff is this guy. Just… who the eff. Even Bellamy was all, “Get Riley and the others to med bay.” and “Go tell them. Go tell Riley I should have left him to die.”
WHO THE EFF?
Then Bellamy explained what happened, his reasons, and also all of his insecurities about his past behaviour.
Which prompted Clarke to give a rousing speech.
So many people this episode pretending everything is cool when everything is not cool!! Oh man, Raven is so pissed! And she has every right to be. But also Clarke was correct in assuming hope was the answer. And Bellamy was kinda right, but so was Monty and Miller and HOLY SHIT EVERYONE WAS WRONG BUT EVERYONE WAS ALSO RIGHT (except Jaha).
Man, this show. THIS SHOW. It’s so grey, pedestrians walk on it. No, I can do better. It lives in the grey so much it’s like a bird in England! (Cause it always rains there?) No. It’s so grey it should change it’s name to Earl, and then soak… in hot water? Okay fine, I’m done. What I’m saying is, I LOVE that there are no clear answers on this show. There is no right and wrong, good vs. evil, ice cream vs. candy. It has us constantly guessing, always thinking, always passionate.
Well done, show. I am very excited to see where this mayhem takes us.
SOME STUFF
- It’s Riley! (For real, you guys, they made such a big deal about this guy that I legit had to google him to see if he was already a character on this show and I just forgot – then I googled to see if he was a character in the books. FYI – he is not.)
- Glowing butterfly! We haven’t seen that beautiful harbinger of doom since season 1. Welcome back to the show!
- The adorable Jasper-Monty best-friendship high-five is back, and I could NOT be happier. Sure, it was brought on by Jasper going a little bananas, but I will TAKE IT.
- What do you guys think the Beautiful Creepster and Emori are doing? Robbing stagecoaches? Making out in inappropriate places? Tracking down her Ninja Turtle dad?
- I have had “I don’t like Mondays” in my head for hours and I’m ready to pull an Octavia on Jasper.
- The new kid’s mother said “avenge me” just before dying, and I am not kidding when I say that is my legitimate dream. Obviously VERY far in the future, but there is nothing I want more than for my last words to be a murmured “avenge me”, and my loving family and friends gathered at my bedside to be all, “wait, what?” THAT WILL BE MY LAST BIT, YOU GUYS.
[Originally Posted February 2017 on tv.com]
Toni Watches 
ORIGINAL POST COMMENTS
BeautifulCreepster
Jun 09, 2017
Love your recaps as always!
Klaussays
Feb 26, 2017
Bellamy: i am totally a hero
Raven -_____-
H2gold
Feb 17, 2017
“there will be mass murder…and a really tough moral dilemma”…sheer perfection.
peterspoor33
Feb 17, 2017
When Jaha starts a monologue at someone by saying something like “Curioser and curioser” or “Heavy is the head that wears the crown” etc. I somehow just don’t feel that his observations are gonna endear him to like… anyone human. I’d say his best relationship is with Murphy – probably because he just happened to stay alive longest in his company. I was watching and thought “..but Toni, he’s changed his hair and goatee.. 🙂 ”
Explain to me how Kane’s gosh darn do-goodness on Earth makes him so likeable – and yet in space it makes him kind of a douche.
By Grabthar’s Hammer, by the suns of Warvan, you shall be avenged [Dr Lazarus – Galaxy Quest]
Riley’s alive… nuff said!
peterspoor33
Feb 17, 2017
My last words will be asking for a recital of the Unity Day prayer.
KendraNutt
Feb 15, 2017
Great to see your photo recaps back again. Somehow life seems complete lol.
Savvytvfan91
Feb 15, 2017
Your last point about saying “Avenge me”. Is exactly what I said. Almost exactly.
walter_ec
Feb 15, 2017
It’s good to have you back with your recaps, just love them. Favorite parts, all related to Riley; especially the one with Clark hugging him and the expression of her saying thank god, just perfect.
Octavia has become like Echo. The thing is, for whom is she murdering people? Skaikru or trikru.
I can’t stand Jasper, he is now the most annoying character after Jaha. I hope Echo kills him. But, I think is more likely that he goes with Echo as a witness to tell Roan that Skaikru is working just to save themselves and nobody else. He has to spread misery everywhere.
Everybody was right and wrong at the same time except Raven, how does she expect that people help if they think that they are going to die anyway? Clark was right hope was the answer.
Loralee_jk
Feb 12, 2017
Someone in Adventure Squad is going to end up killing Riley.
DalekSpider
Feb 12, 2017
OMG RILEY! Yep that utterly confused me as well, thought he was some character I’d forgotten about from series 1. But he has already annoyed me because we really do NOT need any more characters because that’s just going to spread the already limited screen time from all our Favs! (and if he causes this I’m going to hope Octavia pays him a little visit one evening). Having said that, I do like angry-teen-mum-avenger (haven’t figured what his actual name is cos I don’t know if those are I’s or L’s or both). Hope Octavia doesn’t think those tattoos on his forehead are a ‘tear here’ mark – or that could be awkward.
But KANE AND ABBY! FINALLY!Oh the feels!I’m actually not that much of a Kabby shipper but I love both characters and so pleased they got at least a little time of happiness together before the inevitable sh!tstorm of series 4 ramps up. Am I a bad person for being a little bit glad they look like they are being split up because that will cause lots more glorious angst?(cos basically I would happily watch an entire episode that was nothing but angsty Kane .. well with just Kane actually, preferably topless obviously and…hang on, I’m saying this out loud aren’t I…).
*ahem*Anyway …When I was watching this episode, when Jaha appeared my genuine reaction RIGHT AWAY was the following: “Perhaps this new haircut will make me interesting … NOPE!”see what you’ve done Toni! XD
But what’s worse is that Clarke seems to have taken direction from the Jaha leadership manual of tell-them-its-all-fine-cos-that-never-ends-badly *sigh*.
I am struggling very much with the concept that Alpha station is somehow going to be their ‘salvation’. Ok yes it survived many years in space but it did smash rather violently into the ground and the structure will be severely … compromised. But for this I have to remove my Engineering head (but not in an Octavia manner) and just go with the crazy plot.
But oh the greyness! All hail the grey areas. I’m Scottish so I have a great appreciation of the grey (one of the best words ever btw is: dreich).
Once again a hilarious re-cap, next to the episodes themselves this is the other thing I most look forward to each week.
Toni_watches Feb 12, 2017
I just looked up dreich, and yes, that sums it up exactly.
nickmoose
Feb 11, 2017
Phew! That’s a relief! I was so scared that I was gonna come on here and everyone would be rejoicing over Riley’s triumphant return and recounting some heroic scene from season one, where he famously defeated an entire battalion of grounders and saved Clarke’s life, which resulted in his apparent death and I was going to have to consider the possibility that I might have early stage Alzheimer’s, as there is no other possible way I could have forgotten such a legendary character!
Maybe ,just for the sake of continuity, they should pull a George Lucas and go back and digitally insert him into the background of every scene in season one, so his sudden significance doesn’t seem so jarring.
nickmoose
Feb 11, 2017
Who else thought when that butterfly came on screen that Octavia was going to kill it? Smash it, squash it, shoot it with an arrow, slice it in half with a sword, do SOMETHING horrible and murdery to it? I thought for SURE that was where they were going with that, you know, to illustrate the juxtaposition between her “Oooh, pretty butterfly!” persona in season one and her ” You guys need anybody killed? Cuz I’m not doing anything if you need somebody killed. How ’bout that guy over there? Do you want that guy killed? I’ll just go ahead and kill that guy” persona that she has now. Somehow though, the butterfly survived and Octavia wasn’t even IN that SCENE! This show is ALWAYS surprising me!
MichelleHood24
Feb 11, 2017
Fantastic recap for a fantastic episode, this season is on fire already. Octavia is bad ass and Ive loved watching her decent into the deep dark it compelling and very entertaining but seriously get her some help. As you said this Riley person better be a damn unicorn who can poop water generators other wise what was the point of risking everyone’s life’s for just a handful of people. Jaha makes me so mad I actually prey to the to gods for his death every episode, there are only two TV characters that make me wish for their horrible death and that black jack Randell (outlander) and jaha.
I can’t wait for next weeks episode looks good.
lindhoffen Feb 10, 2017
“it should change it’s name to Earl”
ITS name. I know we’re all excited, but let’s stick to correct grammar, aight?
Toni_watches Feb 11, 2017
THE RECAP IS RUINED! I’m not even going to change it. I’m going to leave it there as a fiery, raging beacon of
my shame.
lindhoffen Feb 21, 2017
LOL
ithinkwedeserveadrinkrn
Feb 12, 2017
Hahahaha
mellafe
Feb 10, 2017
I can’t stop laughing at your last wish! Hahaha. Can I borrow it? Cause that would be super dope, like the kids say. Hahahahaha.
*get serious*
Ok, I’m so glad I’m not the only one who thought this episode was kinda slow. I liked it but meh. Also, Jaha will forever be the worst. I hate him.
Also, if Echo kills Jasper, I’ll do a backflip, I swear. I’d never found him annoying before but now it’s like, SHUT UP JASPER, I can’t deal with his personality anymore (except for the High five cause that was beautiful and I cheered for realsies). It’s one of those things I never knew I needed and now I crave, so yes please, Echo, do us all a favor.
I do love, forever and always, that this show makes us all think and talk about it after every single episode. I’d missed that and it’s what I enjoy the most, read/hear the different takes people have, perceptions, etc. It’s super fun and I’m here for that. And the puns, obviously.
Finally, YAY RILEY!!!!
(WHO THE FUCK IS HE AND DOES BELLAMY KNOW HIM FROM THE ARK? WTF?)
oneeetwentyoneguuuns
Feb 10, 2017
I thought I was the only one who was kind of just done with Jasper. Like, I get it, you were in love (or really thought you were) and you feel betrayed that someone you considered your friend was technically responsible. That being said, though, he’s not the only one who’s lost someone. And the fact that not one person has called him out on this bugs me. Just as much as it bugs me that he’s still causing Clarke to doubt herself and see herself in a negative light. Like, yes, she’s made mistakes. Decisions that I’ve screamed at the television for. And yet? When shit hits the fan, who’s the first person they look to? Not too sure I want his character to be killed off, but I would like to see a change. Or see someone just lose it and call him out on all his crap.
daisymae2u
Feb 10, 2017
Such a great recap! I have some predictions I am gonna throw out… Octavia will murder or attempt to murder Jaha-ha-ha… Riley will “comfort” Brian or Miller causing a love triangle. And Clarke will become known as the Shower Nazi, “No semi-decent personal hygiene for you!” 🚫🚿🔥☠
ithinkwedeserveadrinkrn
Feb 10, 2017
I legit burst out laughing at the section about (OMG) Riley. He better be a damn demigod who can create a hydrogenerator out of nothing. This is one your best recaps Toni no doubt no doubt.
ithinkwedeserveadrinkrn Feb 10, 2017
*of your
johnbakernes
Feb 10, 2017
Octavia is officially the anti-Pike. Where he was a major jerk while killing pretty much anyone. With his whole “I have one goal, to keep us alive” Octavia doesn’t miss a step. The scene where Ilan asks Octavia if she’s going to kill him too and the girl SMIRKS at him and says, “I’m sorry about your family” then slinks out of sight!!! It is done. She shall now be known as Darth O, the female reincarnation of Darth Vader.
I can’t wait for Echo to get back to the land of the gullible dumbas… I mean Skaikru, and fills Brother Bellamy in on the fact that Octavia is killing off anyone who gets in the way. Memo to Bellamy, keep Octavia away from butter knives or any damn thing with a point,
When it comes to Darth O, I think the real question isn’t who will she kill but more likely how many more will she kill.
Ode of Darth O:
Blood is Red,
Violets are Blue,
My Boyfriend is Dead
and So Are You!
Off the cuff a bit, maybe Kane would have done better at diplomacy if he wasn’t so busy with Abby playing ‘Doctor’
peterspoor33
Feb 17, 2017
Octavia for ambassador, that ear wipe with the rag was some grade A Grounder diplomacy.
Robespierre
Feb 10, 2017
I just love love love Dark Murderous Octavia. She’s is so off the chain, lol.
Great recap, as always.
“But he’s in the credits” almost made me choke on my coffee.
Mental note: don’t drink coffee when reading your recaps. Should have learned years ago. 😀
mellafe
Feb 10, 2017
I used to spill my tea with every single recap, last season, but I’ve learned my lesson this time. 😀
Zsa08
Feb 10, 2017
And they spelled his name right this time in the credits!
oneeetwentyoneguuuns
Feb 10, 2017
So I had to make an account to say this: only discovered these beautiful gems a little while ago and am not embarrassed to admit I just spent the last like 3 hours reading through all of them, starting with the pilot episode. You are a precious cinnamon roll, Toni, and I thank you endlessly for these wonderful lights that shine in today’s darkness.
Also, P.S. the bit with Abby and Roan had me dying xD ‘Feelin’ the burn’
P.P.S. Seriously, who the heck is Riley?! And why are we just hearing about him? And why did I, for a split second, want him to be Clarke’s long-lost brother?
srsr
Feb 10, 2017
The same thing happen to me, when I saw Clarke’s reaction to Riley I tought “omg it’s her brother” then I remembered we’re talking about the ark, only one child allowed, unless you wanna end up like Bellamy and Octavia’s mother.
Also Octavia is the best, but then agan I’ve been saying that since season 1.
Charissa29
Feb 09, 2017
Love em! Keep them coming!
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